renfrew

yesterday i sat in my grandma's car freaking out about having to go to renfrew for binge eating disorder treatment. renfrew is an eating disorder specialty residential place in florida, and i was terrified it'd be like the hospital, where the staff laughed at me when i freaked out, and ignored me when i had panic attacks, and let me get beat up, then blamed me. the only good thing about the hospital is that i fell in love there. i know, not a smart idea, but it's not like it normally would be. she was (and is) amazing. she listens to me, and she knows how big a part of my life music is.

anyway, more about renfrew, it's not locked, so you can wander around, you get to be integrated with the adults, so it's definitely a bit more relaxed than other places i've been to, and i still don't know if there are roommates yet. that is one of the biggest things i worry about, because i was sexually assaulted by a roommate in a hospital and it really fucked me up a bit.

but i'm going to get to see it before i go, so that's a bit comforting.